A New Microsong Every Week (OR SO)

Bummed I didn’t drop a Halloween microsong this year!  Just couldn’t quite get it together in time.  Oh well, this imminent election is a slightly bigger deal … As you ponder your choices, I offer only this advice: reflect on the concept of freedom.  What does it really mean to you?  It’s not a rhetorical question, but I believe if you consider this thoughtfully, you will make a good decision at the ballot box.  #vote #microsong

I came up with this ditty on a day that it seemed like every meal, every opportunity to eat anything of any kind, was yet another encounter with crunchy bread with cheese.  Don’t get me wrong.  I love crunchy bread with cheese!  But is it possible to have too much of a good thing?  My prodigious gut says yes, yes it is.  #microsong

Is this thing even on?!  I should’ve just called you instead. #microsong

Call it the corollary to “Wind Beneath My Wings”.  We all have someone in our lives to whom we can dedicate this microsong.  Today, this one goes out to that sack of crap trying to claw his way back to the White House.  I don’t even have to say his name. #microsong #shitler

Wouldn’t it be great if we could resolve all our geopolitical disputes like this?  You know, with mostly naked surrogates, trying to beat each other?  It would be more civilized than what we’ve got.  #microsong #olympics #olympics2024 

We are living in some crazy times, my friends.  Angry words turn into angry deeds.  There are threats of violence, and then there is actual violence.  It’s tempting to stay in your corner, turn to your tribe and raise your guard.  But you’re gonna get what you give.  Don’t get sucked into the scrum.  I dare you to be brave.  Stay centered in yourself.  Trade that fist for an open hand.  #microsong

This world will try to steal your joy.  Don’t let it make you into a Squidward!  #microsong

Election season is beginning, and with it – especially this time – a torrent of bullshit is headed our way.  Mainstream Mediapolis wants to sell you things.  The Trump Dump reeks of self-serving lies.  Biden Blah-Blah Burgh will only tell you part of the story.  And I’ve already wasted your time in Funtown.  So come on down to Non-Bullshit Town.  I think you’ll find it’s worth the trip. #microsong

Still buzzing from the punk energy of The Idles’ show last week (and apparently, still healing from a mosh pit impact I took on the chin) I offer you this little ditty inspired by both British punk rock, and British politeness.  This microsong could be from the perspective of a bloke whose shoe you just stepped on, insisting it’s really quite alright when really, it is not! #microsong

May the 4th be with you!  This is kind of what I imagine a song about Jedi might sound like coming from Judas Priest, or Dio-era Sabbath.  Word on the street in Corscant has it those monastic order die-hards like to par-tay!!! #starwars #maythe4th #jedi #microsong

On the occasion of this Earth Day, I’d like to observe that we are, as usual, doing a lot more harm than good.  And corporate do-gooderism professing to give 1% of profits back “to the environment” is a laughably small fig leaf.  What planet gets the other 99%?  As currency seemed like a decent visual metaphor, I’m calling this Part 2 of a 3 microsong series (kind of) about money.  Next week: the bills come due … #microsong #EarthDay

Back after a week off for my 60th microsong!  This one concerns the cares of this world, which sure can start to feel pretty HEAVY sometimes.  We’ve all got to help each other to bear it.  #microsong

This one was kind of tough to belt out!  I probably picked up this expression from Bender on Futurama, but apparently it’s something gamblers say for good luck before they toss the dice.  There are songs with this title, but I didn’t find one with this same melody.  Sorry/not sorry for the “dad joke” at the end. #microsong

Does it ever feel like life is pounding on your head, as if it were a nail sticking up out of the floorboard?  This is a microsong for when you feel like that.  Loosely inspired by the old traditional “Nine Pound Hammer”, I suppose this one makes a nice bookend to “Knockout”: instead of knocking you out, this time I’m knocking myself out. #microsong

For the occasion of an “atmospheric river” dumping on us here in LA, I offer this precipitation-themed microsong.  To me, the way this one ends offers a hint of sunshine to come.  And it will; it always does … But until then, please be careful out there, my fellow Angelenos. #microsong 

BAM!  I tried to warn you … Don’t worry, no iPhones were harmed in the making of this microsong.  Thanks Denise for loaning me the boxing gloves! #microsong 

I decided to end 2023 with a microsong that felt like a New Year’s Resolution.  It’s inspired a bit by the Jungian concept of the “shadow self” and that we cannot fully integrate ourselves until we’ve reckoned with that shadow.  I used the word “synthesize” because I believe that in so doing, we make a new, better version of ourselves.  Good luck with that to us all in 2024!   #microsong

I made up this song for my dog, Rosie, as we were walking one day.  The message would be more applicable to say, a wayward, young adult human daughter; but I don’t have one of those, so I sang it to Rosie instead.  She left us almost two years ago, right around this time of year.  I miss her a lot.  Rosie was a good girl.  #microsong

I’ve had the privilege to work as a writer, off and on, in kids’ animation for nearly two decades now.  In that time, I’ve occasionally been asked to write for a demographic that maybe doesn't actually exist.  This is the theme song for one such imaginary cohort. #microsong 

Took another week off, but I’m back with a Halloween special: it’s Loki!  Or I should say, a Loki “variant” – one with glasses, and hair more like Thor’s.  This song was inspired by the excellent Marvel TV series.  Poor Loki, he should try keepin’ it low key a little more often.  He seems a little stressed.  #loki #lokiforpresident #mcu #halloween #microsong

At last, fall is here … I’ve been waiting for a while to deploy this seasonal microsong! Multiple takes got my room a bit messy, but … worth it. #microsong

“Always, at every moment, there will be the thrill of victory, the sensation of trampling on an enemy who is helpless. If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face— forever.” — George Orwell, 1984 #microsong

This microsong is probably 25 years old! And ridiculous as this may sound, it may have co-authors: at least a couple old friends sang it with me on a recording I have from back in the day. The dumb message, however, is obviously timeless. #microsong

For some reason, I feel like Rolf from The Muppets would have come up with this microsong – if he were fronting a heavy metal band.  This sounds like something Rolf would have considered profound.  #microsong

The bean counters and corporate stooges want to sell you a story about how everything must be sacrificed at the altar of their god, Mammon.  It is precisely this story that has set our planet on fire.  Don’t you believe it. #fuckcapitalism

Microsongs goes outdoors!  Owing to its nature, this one had to actually be performed in my neighborhood.  Included are neighborhood sounds, and the jangling of Lily’s leash & collar.  My car also makes a brief cameo.

Of course, this is absurd: you can’t fall in love with a tomato.  What a silly idea, right?!  Then again, it is a beautiful little fruit.  I wonder: does it love me back?  I never asked to have these feelings.

Okay, maybe the melody isn’t exactly catchy.  But the message is irresistible.  Sing it loudly with your coworkers on the job!

This surreal ditty is about as close as I’m gonna get to a Father’s Day-themed microsong.  Lily’s confession is: “I’m just a colony of bees in a dog suit, Dad.”  That really explains a lot to me.

What if Thom Yorke did a rendition of the AutoZone slogan?  For many (good) reasons, this never happened.  But if it had, it would have been a B side from the Kid A/Amnesiac era, and it would have sounded something like this.

Sometimes, there is no deeper meaning or double entendre in a microsong.  This is one of those simpler ones, just celebrating the simple joy of having a root beer float.  You know you want one!

I sang this microsong to my dog, Rosie (RIP) when she seemed to be overwhelmed by a plethora of city noises as we drove around town. My aim was to calm her down, or at least just distract her with a basic truth. Worked pretty well! 

Happy Earth Day! This little ditty, originally conceived for an idiotic character named Skylab Willowlord, exemplifies why the environmental movement has largely been a failure: to many, the messaging comes across like this.

Ah, fuck: such a versatile word … This one begins reveling in the sexual meaning of “fuck” but then it takes a hard turn toward the “getting messed with” meaning.  I hope you enjoy the fuck out of it! #microsong #fuck

I love my adopted home of Los Angeles, but sometimes, it sure feels like this city doesn’t love me back. Those times are a little bit shitty.

All the rain lately inspired me to dust off this old microsong. It’s about the complex relationship we have with water. We have to have it, and it’s quite useful; and yet, too much of it, and we’re dead. You better respect water.

I came up with this song when I was scanning the FM dial in Phoenix (I grew up there). I kept hitting country stations. It all sounded like this to me.

It’s a microsong about butts! Crass? I’ll leave that to you to decide, but know this: compared to many microsongs to come, this one is tame. Sooo tame.

I came up with this microsong during a visit to Legoland.  Part of the park is actually called Funtown.  I wondered what living in a place called Funtown might be like.  Emotional tyranny, that’s what. 

But a few old chestnuts are still available here.